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Food Motherhood Uncategorized

Introducing Baby to Solids – Guidelines I Follow to Ensure Optimal Gut Health

updated on January 17, 2021February 6, 2015Learning

10 Tips: How to Raise a Reader

Two nights ago my daughter read a sentence all by herself for the first time, and left me at a loss for words. I was amazed …

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updated on July 30, 2016February 5, 2015Mom to Mom

35 Things I’ve Learned From Having Kids

  Being a mother is challenging and exhausting but also rewarding and wonderful, all at the same time. The following is a list of some …

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updated on January 17, 2021February 4, 2015Learning

Teaching Your Child to Write

When my daughter was three and a half years old, I attempted to teach her to write her name in preparation for kindergarten, and failed. …

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updated on February 7, 2018February 3, 2015Food Healthy Living Nutrition

6 Healthy Breakfast Options for Kids & Moms

Every mom knows the importance of breakfast and the role it plays in helping their children grow and succeed in school but most mom’s, including myself, …

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updated on September 15, 2019February 2, 2015Learning

25 Toys I Love (for kids aged 1-4)

There are countless options out there when choosing toys for our toddlers and young children and sometimes you may even feel a bit overwhelmed as …

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updated on July 30, 2016February 1, 2015My Life

Being a Healthy Mom

Growing up, I always disliked sports and gym class. Anyone that grew up with me knows that. It wasn’t because I was lazy or that …

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updated on August 25, 2016February 1, 2015Mom to Mom

30 Things I Want to Tell My Sons as They Grow Up

While I was creating a list of things that I wanted to teach my daughter, I also started to think about things a mother should …

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updated on September 15, 2019February 1, 2015Learning

Preparing Your Child for Kindergarten

Last February I registered my firstborn for kindergarten. It was a very bittersweet moment – I wasn’t sure if Akshaya would be ready by September …

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updated on August 25, 2016January 31, 2015Mom to Mom

30 Things I Hope to Teach My Daughter Before She is 13

My daughter just started kindergarten this past September and since starting school she has become more mature, independent, and responsible. I couldn’t be more proud …

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updated on January 17, 2021January 30, 2015Healthy Living Wellness

Caring for a Child with Asthma

Asthma, as defined by the Asthma Society of Canada, is a chronic inflammatory disease of the airways. Symptoms can include coughing, wheezing, shortness of breath, …

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About Me

Hello! I'm Geerthana Uthayakumar and I reside in Toronto, Canada with my family of six. I am a homeschooling mom to four fun loving and very energetic children who constantly keep me on my toes. My passion for cooking from scratch, wellness, and culture combined with my love for writing led to the start of Modern Day Brown Mom in 2015. Through my blog I share my parenting adventures, experiences as a young mother, recipes, tips for healthy eating and more. When I'm not looking after the household, experimenting in the kitchen, blogging or writing, I work on my passion project – Devi Wellness Company.

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Geerthana Uthayakumar
One of the things I'm commended for on my platform One of the things I'm commended for on my platform is authenticity. However a lot of you also wonder how I'm able to share such personal aspects of my life in spite of being a South Asian woman. Like many of us, I was brought up in a culture which valued reputation and family honour/respect. I never understood the importance placed on what other people thought because it seemed no matter what you did or didn't do, people gossiped anyways. Regardless I tried my best to steer clear of becoming gossip. Then I became pregnant prior to marriage. Both my immediate and extended family on both my mom and dad's side were shocked but supported me anyways. The pregnancy is not something we hid and I realize I was privileged to do that. However we knew gossip would ensue from within the community. When my daughter was born less than four months after our civil wedding, our community passed around the news as if they had chanced upon some great discovery. A woman from the community had seen my husband bringing in a car seat to the hospital, put two and two together and spread the news around like wildfire before we even made it home. I knew my mom was disappointed but we told ourselves when people gossip it's a reflection of themselves and not us, and we moved on. My reason for sharing the imperfect parts of life is a means of resisting more than anything. I'm resisting the notion life should be perfect. I'm resisting the urge to portray myself as someone I'm not and invalidating my experiences, growth, and who I am in the process. The woman that announced the birth of my child lived her life trying to hide from the choices she made in her own life. Perhaps gossiping about me made her feel better about herself. But I refuse to live in fear of what other people think of me. I refuse to let people shame me for things I'm not ashamed of. I want to talk about the difficult stuff, the real stuff, and normalize the fact that real people have real problems. With that being said, I only share things after I've had time to process and heal from so that it's not triggering. I'm not perfect but neither are any of us and that's okay. . . . #moderndaybrownmom #reallife
Remember that post I wrote on mom guilt a few days Remember that post I wrote on mom guilt a few days back? Well it really got me thinking of how much credit I deserve to give myself and yet hardly ever do. I'm one of those people that feel like I'm wasting time if I sit still. I'm one of those people that feel satisfaction from checking things off my to-do list. I push myself to be productive despite the circumstances. Maybe I measure my self worth in accordance with my productivity. Yet I'm hardly ever satisfied with myself because I'm never able to do all that I want to do. I obviously have very unrealistic expectations of myself and that mentality is one that definitely needs to be addressed. One thing I hardly ever do is order out. I cooked when I had pneumonia. I cooked on the fifth day after my C-section. I cooked when I had an autoimmune flare in my elbow. The main issue with ordering out is my anxiety over what's in the food and how it's handled. With food cooked at home, I know exactly what goes in and how, in terms of cleanliness, it's prepared. The second issue stems from me not feeling productive and thus guilty if I don't cook the meals myself. I know - it doesn't make sense even to me 🤦‍♀️ Recently I started thinking of how my children must perceive me and it really put things into perspective for me. They never see me take a break or rest. The idea that my daughters might grow up to overwork themselves like me and the idea that my sons might grow up with skewed expectations of the capability of women makes me want to do better. So this weekend when my husband offered to order food, like he does every weekend or the week I'm on my period, I graciously accepted instead of being offended. It's going to take some getting used to but I'm definitely going to be making this a normal thing. And as of yesterday I'm back in the kitchen doing what I love. LUNCH: Pol roti with green onions, tomato curry, and potato masala. . . . #momguilt #lunch #tamilfood #eeeeeats #foodstagram #foodie #instayum #instafood #feedfeed #culture #foodphotography #moderndaybrownmom #momlife #motheroffour #embracingculture #tamil #southasianblogger #tamilblogger #mommyblogger
So often times people, both women and men, tell me So often times people, both women and men, tell me that they believe in equality but aren't feminists. Unfortunately feminists tend to be perceived as bra-burning, overtly sexual, men-hating women striving for a matriarchal world. However feminism should not be confused with misandry (hatred/mistrust towards men). The feminist movement was initiated by women during a time when women were not allowed to vote, open bank accounts, or own property and over the decades it has evolved to tackle so much more. Feminism believes in equality for all women, men, and transgender people. Perhaps it's important to remember that equal does not mean identical.There are differences between men and women but feminism believes those differences should not be determinative of one's ability to have legal rights, access to opportunity, and whether or not one experiences oppression. The feminist fight is not a fight between men and women but humans against patriarchy; the social and cultural system in which masculinity is favoured and heterosexual men hold power and respect and thus dominate society. Patriarchy promotes gender stereotypes, oppression, misogyny, and sexism. It perpetuates oppressive, gender-limiting roles, the political and economic subordination of women thus the gender wage gap, rape culture, sexual exploitation of children and women, gender-based violence, homophobia, transphobia, and much more. Patriarchy is the reason why women are/were refused the right to vote, own bank accounts, have abortions, own property, education, positions of power in an attempt to keep women, secondary, subservient, and dependent on men. It's important to note that the patriarchy affects women differently based on their socioeconomic status and that certain communities are oppressed more than others due to the lack of privileges. Our privileges should never blind us from intersectionality and the problems that exist as a result. Contrary to popular belief, patriarchy harms everyone regardless of gender, sex, sexual orientation, etc. Thus feminism fights for the social, political, and economic equality of all. Now tell me, do you consider yourself a #feminist? #moderndaybrownmom #IWD
When I was in elementary school, the female teache When I was in elementary school, the female teachers, regardless of race, would always ask for "strong boys" to help carry or move something slightly heavy. It was assumed that boys were stronger.  When I was a teen, I heard my male peers insult each other with the phrase "don't be such a girl." It was assumed that boys were superior. When I was a young adult, I quickly learned the easiest way to stop a boy from pursuing was to tell him I had a boyfriend, even if I didn't. It was assumed a man deserved respect. When I became pregnant at 21, it was expected that I stay at home and my husband provide, despite me having the better odds to secure a job. It was assumed that men were the providers. When I was 22, a white, older, male professor walked into my class consisting of three girls in total, to find boys at my lab bench and announced with a sigh "this is why we don't have girls in labs." He rolled his eyes when one of those boys told him I was helping them understand the prelab calculations. It was just assumed that boys were smarter. When I was pregnant with my second child, I had placenta previa and requested a tubal ligation in the case of a C-section. I was asked by my very kind, intelligent, female, Asian OBGYN to go home and consult with my husband first. It was assumed that men made the decisions, even when it came to my body and reproductive rights. To this day, people openly express their surprise when they learn I haven't taken on my husband's name and ask how he feels about it. It is assumed that a man's opinion matters more. My point is that, everyday sexism is perpetuated regardless of race, gender, age, culture, and socioeconomic status. It is deeply rooted within all of us and until we are consciously aware of it and work to challenge it, it will continue to hinder any steps we take towards acquiring gender equality. March 8th is International Women's Day and the theme of this year is #choosetochallenge. So here's a reminder to choose to challenge gender stereotypes, biases and assumptions because a challenged world is an alert world and an alert world brings the change we need. #moderndaybrownmom #equality #feminist #IWD2021
Lately I've been seeing post after post about #mom Lately I've been seeing post after post about #momguilt. It's something that affects all of us despite what season of motherhood we are in. We know the system holds moms to a different standard than dads when guilt itself is genderized but what I've concluded since motherhood is that patriarchy is addicted to the free labour of a mom. We are conditioned to think of mom as "selfless" and "supermom." We are conditioned to think that neglecting ourselves and overworking ourselves to the point of burnout trying to juggle it all are the ultimate compliments. The more we do for our kids and our family, the more favourably we are judged by not only others but ourselves as well. Society has ingrained in us what it means to be a good mom and consequently guilt arises when we cannot live up to these unrealistic expectations. When we prioritize anything but the kids we are criticized, called selfish, and looked down upon by society and it's unfair because fathers are never judged this harshly. Infact any small effort on their part is praised. They take sick days, breaks, rest as needed because they don't feel the same guilt we do for taking care of ourselves. How ludacris is it that our basic need like a shower is disguised and sold to us as self care? Society expects mothers to snap back instead of taking the time to care for ourselves. We are expected to intuitively know how to be a good mother. We tell women they can do it all, yet we forget to mention the part about not all at once at the same time, at least not without a village for support. Maybe if we saw mothers as humans, each trying their best with what they've got, we'd also simultaneously stop comparing, judging, criticizing, and shaming, helping eliminate the unnecessary guilt that moms tend to feel for things beyond our capacity or control. But our social system thrives on overwhelmed and exhausted women questioning their self-worth so as long as we feel shame about our inability to meet an impossible ideal, the system wins. Moms, let go of that guilt for that is not something we can fix internally. We need to collectively question the system instead of ourselves. #moderndaybrownmom #dismantlingpatriarchy
Akshaya has been baking with me since she turned t Akshaya has been baking with me since she turned two years old. Now at 10, she's become quite the confident baker along with her two brothers who are equally interested in baking goodies. As a result the kids have been eager to start a part-time cookie business for some time now. Although I've been hesitant because of all the work that will inevitability be involved, I know it means a lot for them to have me encourage and support their dreams. So that's what I'm choosing to do. And typical Modern Day Brown Mom style, this too will be used as a learning opportunity. My mind is filled with all the practical ways I can incorporate math, language, and business management (my dad is probably nodding approvingly as he reads this haha). The kids will hopefully learn to think as entrepreneurs as they will be responsible for all the aspects of running their business including but not limited to planning, executing, keeping a record of recipes and expenses, budgeting, packaging, answering emails, and writing captions for their social media posts. I've only signed on to be their editor, product photographer, and oven operator due to their age limitations. Apparently they don't have enough of a budget to pay me for my work though. You can find my littles over at @foursprinklesofsugar where they hope to document their baking adventure and sell their cookies. Your support is much appreciated! Logo: @ar.inks . . . #foursprinklesofsugar #cookies #cookieshop #bakery #delicious #foodie #dessert #cookiebox #baking #sprinkles #sugar #smallbusiness #kidbusiness #kidentrepreneurs #bakers #toronto #torontobakery #torontobakers #kidbakers #torontobusiness #momblogger #momlife #supportinglittlepeoplewithbigdreams #moderndaybrownmom
There is so much to learn from just being in the k There is so much to learn from just being in the kitchen. The kids spent the first half of homeschooling experimenting with temperature, techniques, and baking times to yield the perfect chocolate chip pecan cookie. None of the cookies are perfectly round but they are crispy on the outside and soft in the centre and have that rustic, homemade with love look! . . . Bracelet: @cozmicbeads . . . #chocolatechipcookies #dessert #cookiebox #cookies #vegetariankids #vegetarian #foodpics #foodshare #whatifeedmykids #instayum #instagood #foodstagram #eeeeeats #momlife #mommylife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #mommyblogger #foodblogger #tamilblogger #southasianblogger #mothersofig #moderndaybrownmom
Ever since the pandemic hit last March, my husband Ever since the pandemic hit last March, my husband has been in charge of grocery shopping. I send him off with a list and he brings back whatever he can manage to find along with a bunch of random things. Every week, without fail, we get a giant size cassava. This week I made a dish that is quite popular amongst Tamil people; a mild cassava and shrimp dish. I'm not really sure what it's called - maravalli kilanguvum eraalum curry? That somehow sounds wrong so correct me if you know what I'm talking about. This dish is flavoured with onion, curry leaves, mustard seeds, cumin seeds, green chilli, red dried chilli, and a pinch of turmeric and comes together fairly easily. Some people make this without turmeric but I tend to add a pinch to all my root vegetables, especially if I'm not sure in which soil/water conditions they were grown. If you'd like the recipe, let me know below. . . . #moderndaybrownmom #tamilfood #seafood #shrimp #cassava #curry #eeeeeats #foodstagram #foodie #instayum #instafood #feedfeed #culture #foodphotography #moderndaybrownmom #momlife #motheroffour #embracingculture #tamil #southasianblogger #tamilblogger #mommyblogger
Baby girl Shree turned eight months old, three wee Baby girl Shree turned eight months old, three weeks ago. After three attempts, I finally captured a decent milestone picture. Currently Shree is always on the go, crawling, rolling, and climbing on top of her siblings. She's a busy baby and can't sit still. Over the last month she's learned to wave "hi", clap, and point at things she wants or crumbs on the floor 😬. She loves to wave "hi" to her siblings after she wakes up from her nap. Shree's been introduced to water and malli thani (coriander tea) and loves both quite a lot. Recently she's also become very attached to her dad. Her feelings get hurt if he doesn't pick her up the second he walks through the door. It's too bad she doesn't understand that he needs to scrub his hands and shower first considering we're still in the midst of a pandemic. As you guys can probably tell, Shree's hair is getting wilder by the month. I was so sure as it grew longer it would sort itself out but it seems like it has a mind of its own. People often ask if I'm planning on shaving her head and I doubt that I'd be doing that. For those that don't know, it's customary for Tamil people to shave their baby's head on their 31st day of life ceremony. I'm not sure what the religious significance behind it is, other than it being seen as cleansing ritual/combat cradle cap, but I do know people believe the hair grows back thicker, denser, and stronger. Because my eldest was born premature and in the middle of winter, we opted not to shave her head as she could lose heat from her head. Instead we gave her a really short trim in the summer and her hair grew back before the following winter. With my boys born in spring, I gave them a trim as well. I wasn't worried about achieving thicker hair because all my kids were born with a head full of thick hair. With Shree I've been lagging, but this month she'll get her trim as well. Hopefully some of it grows back before her first birthday. Did you follow custom and shave your baby's head or did you opt for a trim instead like me? I'd love to know! . . . #ArayanaShree #8monthsold #babymilestones #tamilcustoms #culture #momblogger #motherhoodthroughinstagram #mommyblogger #moderndaybrownmom
The kids' father was born and raised in Sri-Lanka The kids' father was born and raised in Sri-Lanka for the first ten or so years of his life. He occasionally speaks of the fruits and sweets he had the luxury of eating there and how nothing we get here ever measures up in comparison. I've never tried a lot of the foods he remembers eating as I wasn't born there and haven't visited either. However I do try my best to make attempts at recreating them for him. One of the things he had been craving for some time was panankai paniyaram, which I've heard my parents reminisce over as well. Since there is no way we could get our hands on a ripe Palmyra fruit, we got a jar of of panankai paste from the Tamil grocers and I made paniyaram using the same method I make vaipan (banana fritters). It turned out delicious, crisp on the outside and pillowy in the centre, and nothing like what I tried from the various Tamil stores here. On Family Day yesterday, we opted for a simple, traditional breakfast consisting of roast paan, spicy tuna fish varai, panankai paniyaram, and masala tea. Vegetarians had coconut sambol in place of the fish varai. I love how food has the ability to connect us to our roots and eachother. . . . #moderndaybrownmom #tamilfood #breakfast #masalatea #tea #chai #tamilbreakfast #tunafish #panakai #paniyaram #eeeeeats #foodstagram #foodie #instayum #instafood #feedfeed #culture #foodphotography #moderndaybrownmom #momlife #motheroffour #embracingculture #tamil #southasianblogger #tamilblogger #mommyblogger
We met when we were 18 and 22. Three years later w We met when we were 18 and 22. Three years later we wound up pregnant and planned a life together while naively thinking that things between us wouldn't change. Regardless things always change and sometimes no matter how hard you try life throws obstacles at you right, left, and center forcing you to deviate from that plan, even if it's temporary. While pregnant I worked, studied and rented an apartment while my husband fulfilled his responsibility to his family before moving in with me. At a time where we needed support the most, we had people meddling in our marriage and causing issues between us. I wrongfully resented my husband over things he didn't have much control over, which set the tone of our marriage for pretty much the past decade. In the first year of marriage my husband broke his hand requiring surgery, I was hospitalized for a severe Lupus flare which was undiagnosed at the time, and then he broke his ankle all within three months of each other. In the midst of all that we found out we were pregnant with our second child. My husband lost his job. I failed my labs that semester for missing them while hospitalized. After my son's birth I was diagnosed with Lupus and was on treatment for three years. No matter how hard we worked, it felt like nothing was meant to be for us. We had so much on our plate and we were struggling with no time catch a break, let alone time to ourselves. We both had a painful chronic illness, and a child diagnosed with asthma severe enough to require daily medication and sometimes even hospitalization. The same day our eldest started school I cut my finger and required stitches, and that same year we both contracted pneumonia. When our third child was born, his health conditions made everything even more unbearable especially when instead of support we were met with drama. Although we stayed together for the sake of our family, we drifted apart as a couple and it was obvious. Our mental health was suffering and neither of us were happy. I took solace in doing more and more and he took solace in his friends and alcohol to numb the pain. I needed support at home and didn't know how to ask. CONTINUED IN COMMENTS.
Between yesterday and today the kids and I baked o Between yesterday and today the kids and I baked over 150 cookies for our loved ones to enjoy over the Valentine's Day/family day long weekend. Although the smell of butter currently makes me nauseous, the kids are contemplating starting a part-time cookie business 🙃 From left to right: Chocolate chip cookies with pecans, rocky road bars, masala flavoured short bread with dark chocolate and rose petals, lemon crinkle cookies, and raspberry almond thumbprint cookies. Wooden cookie box: @anthropologie Enjoy the long weekend everyone ❤ . . . #valentinesday2021 #valentinesday #dessert #cookiebox #cookies #vegetariankids #vegetarian #foodpics #foodshare #whatifeedmykids #instayum #instagood #foodstagram #eeeeeats #momlife #mommylife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #mommyblogger #foodblogger #tamilblogger #southasianblogger #mothersofig #moderndaybrownmom
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